BlogWonks

The lamestream media has publicly announced that:

Brilliant democrat political advisor James Carville, with a brilliant and ground-breaking new strategy, is asking the public for slogans for the democrat party. He denies it is a tacit admission that we, the people, may be more capable of expressing what’s important to us than the leadership of his party.

Here are suggestions for the skull-faced smirking strategist from dashing-looking guest columnist Craig Cantoni:

–Vote Democrat, so you can fornicate, procreate and marry the state instead of a mate.

–Vote Democrat, so you can sleep in class and still pass.

–Vote Democrat, so you can skip your homework and get a free tutor.

–Vote Democrat, so instead of stealing your neighbor’s stuff yourself and risk getting shot, you can hire government agents to do the stealing for you.

–Vote Democrat, so your obese kids can eat Doritos, Cheetos, Fritos and Tostidos at home and still get free breakfast and lunch burritos at school.

–Vote Democrat, so you can blame your lack of industriousness on the industrious.

–Vote Democrat, so you can blame your low wages on the rich instead of on your tattoos, rings, studs and purple hair.

–Vote Democrat, so you can blame your obesity on genetics.

–Vote Democrat, so you can feign a disability and get free stuff at everyone else’s expense.

–Vote Democrat, so you can spend $800 a month on cell phones, lottery tickets, fast food and big-screen televisions, and then claim that you can’t afford health insurance.

–Vote Democrat, so you can spend a lifetime gorging on ribs, fried chicken, greasy pizza, and lard-soaked refried beans, and then charge your skinny neighbor for your heart surgery.

–Vote Democrat, so you can feel compassionate and generous by giving other people’s money to the poor.

–Vote Democrat, so that you can live beyond your means and then steal from the savings of those who lived below their means for your retirement.

–Vote Democrat, so you can show the capitalists that the only problem with Marxism is how Stalin, Mao and Castro implemented it.

–Vote Democrat, so you can rant about discrimination while demanding special privileges for your race.

–Vote Democrat, so you can accuse Republicans of being war mongers while ignoring the war mongering of your own party.

–Vote Democrat, so you can claim to care about kids while encouraging single parenting and out-of-wedlock births, which are the primary causes of harm to kids.

–If you’re a reporter, vote Democrat, so you will be accepted by the other reporters in the newsroom.

–If you’re a liberal arts professor, vote Democrat, so you will be accepted by the other professors in the school of liberal arts.

–If you’re a public school teacher, vote Democrat, so you will be accepted by the other union members at your school.

–And if you’re a typical Republican, vote Democrat, so you can stop prtending that you are for limited government.

An author and columnist, Mr. Cantoni can be reached at ccan2@aol.com. Visit his website, Honest Americans Against Legal Theft.