BlogWonks

Nobody’s Opinion; Two giant megalomaniacs met today, each one has vowed to take over the world, and each one plans on using the other to do it. Who will win in this match for global takeover? Will Bill Gates finally take over the rest of the world, in which all paper will disappear, no more books will be printed (in the name of saving trees), everything that you own, watch, and eventually drive will be made by Microsoft? Or will President Hu Jintao let him wire up all of China, and reap the profits? Will Hu Jintao use Bill Gates and all the rest of the big CEO’s of America to get the latest technology into his grasp; thereby letting the Chinese copy it once again and eventually flood the market with an even cheaper system and FREE help to internet problems and in the end putting Microsoft out of business?

Will one day President Hu Jintao say:

“Get out– China owns all companies and all property, and even though our trade surplus in over 600 billion, we’re cashing in. And by the way, pay off your loans, or give us your country. We already have you surrounded; I want the White House painted red.”

The fact that a representative of a major foreign country flew in and met first with a CEO instead of paying respects to the President of the United States says it all, that it really is the big companies that are running our government.…but I do have a few more opinions about it….(of course you knew that.)

Nobody’s Opinion; It was one of those days in life…you hear there is a gator out in your neighborhood running around and you want to catch the gator but, you end up being too tired. The news was such a cannonade of gators today that frankly, I just wanted to crawl up like a puppy and sleep.

But there was one particular story that caught my eye. Some guy, shot and killed his black girlfriend and mother of his child, then went to the catering company where he used to work, and shot and killed the owner and her daughter—then killed himself in the parking lot.

Of course, they showed a picture of a rather worn and tired looking old white lady on the evening news, and her plump and probably single daughter, as the ones in the line of fire. The business had been there for over one hundred years, and it looked about as worn out as its owners. Once it was a thriving neighborhood, but, slowly, as the blacks moved out of the city of St. Louis and to the North, the whole place transformed into a swamp.

Still, the family kept up the business. It was at least theirs. Or more likely, they just couldn’t afford to move. They had lost another member of the family years ago in a robbery, but still, they stayed. They were evidently attached to their local church, and gave generously throughout the years, and even helped saved it from destruction.

The witnesses said they gave food to the hungry and homeless every day. And trust me; by the looks of their pictures, they were barely making ends meet themselves. Good, decent, hard working Americans, just trying to get along.

But they pissed this gator off. Why? They were going to garnish his wages for child support–the cads. And everyone knows that’s the quickest way to piss off a gator.

I was married to a gator once. I also remember the day I decided to get rid of him. We had been fighting, and he was slowly cleaning his new magnum on the back porch, caressing it with every stroke of his special towel. I could tell by the look on his face that he wasn’t thinking about how pretty it looked in the sun.

Well, of course I’m nobody’s fool. I took the guns (he had more than one) and gave them to my brother, who hid them. God knows where they ended up. I never asked.

It was one of the smartest things I ever did.

Anyway, around noon, it was announced on the local radio station that some man had bought bullets at Wal-Mart and told the person who sold him the bullets just exactly what he was going to do—go to his work and kill.

Now, you and I are wondering, who messed up here? Shouldn’t they have had a video of this guy? You would think, since it was on the news that a pathological idiot was about to murder some people, that the police could have prevented it with some quick thinking.

But…you find out that the police can only wait for the crime to happen. They are not in the business to prevent the crime. They will even tell you this fact.

How many women have asked for police protection only to have the policeman say; “We can’t do anything until he commits a crime.”? This answer leaves the citizen in complete panic, because frankly, you are on your own. It’s just the law. Even if the intention to kill is blasted all over the city, we just had to sit and wait.

This rule of course makes for a lot of dead bodies to be on the local evening news.

We never did find out what color he was, because if a black man kills someone in St. Louis, and this happens all the time, you will never hear a broadcaster say what color or race he is. The gator is never named as a gator.

Just like the fact that there is a fine line when black men kill white people, it is never considered a “hate” crime. But if a white person kills a black person, then it is prosecuted as one automatically. At least that’s how it works here in North St. Louis. That is at least the one true legacy of Janet Reno, bless her justice loving heart.

So tonight, a young black child has lost his or her mother AND gator, I mean–father.

The pack could have caught the gator, but it was such a nice day.

Nobody’s Knows: I wish to god someone would finally figure out just what happened to that girl in Aruba. It was on all the stations all day long. I have purposely NOT been following the story, because it’s obvious they are using it as a cover for all the much more important stories that they don’t want you to hear…like the Dubai company buying companies from the British which make our military hardware. The Aruba story is getting so old. I think Gretta should put on a cheerleading outfit and do some cheers to liven it up.

Nobody Cares; Malachy McCourt, brother of the famous author of “Angeles Ashes” Frank McCourt, is going to run on the green party ticket in New York for governor. The potato shortage in Ireland left such a scar that he doesn’t want one more person to have to die, so he is going to get rid of the death penalty, and nuclear energy, protecting the New Yorkers from ever having to become ashes. (Sorry, I couldn’t help myself.)

Nobody’s Perfect: Senator Ted Kennedy wants John Kerry to run again for President. Poor Teddy thinks that America is leaning to the left now, due to gas prices. Teddy thinks this because he staggers to the left when he walks…therefore the whole world looks crooked to him. Someone should tell him America is actually leaning backwards. The poor man is all confused.

Nobody’s Opinion; Being as this is the 45th anniversary of the Bay of Pigs Non-Invasion, I was thinking about one of the few days in my life when perhaps my fathers’ habit of playing 36 holes of golf every Saturday and Sunday had finally done some serious sun damage.

I was just a kid when I walked up to my dad one day in 1962. He was digging a deep hole in our backyard, which in itself was crazy I thought because in Florida, go down too far and you hit water.

“What are you doing?”

“I’m digging an underground shelter.”

“Why?” I was not looking forward too eating beans with my brother for 3 weeks.

“Just in case we need it.”

He didn’t get far. He gave up after one day. Probably my mother told him it was a silly idea. But then again, my mother never had to pick up the remaining pieces of her best friends off the beaches of Guam and put them in a sack, after a night out with her buddies drinking Saki. A leg here, an arm there, mixed with human wrenching.

He must have hit water.

Nevertheless, when your own father, who had no fear of even the worst hurricanes, is afraid of annihilation, then you tend to be too, and the silly “get under your desk” drills at school did not help. Naples was and still is, just well within missile range. (Yes, unlike kids of today, I knew where Cuba was.) I dreamt of mushroom clouds for years afterwards.

I did remember my parents thinking JFK was a pretty boy idiot, and the Cuban Missile Crisis was a huge failure on his part. He was no Ike.

All these years later, we are now at the same moment in time when another missile crisis seems to exist. But no one seems to be alarmed, even at the mention of the U.S. testing bombs again outside of Las Vegas. As long as the slots keep working, it doesn’t matter. That’s how complacent we’ve all become. It’s much more important that we save up for the new I-pods. Or figure out just what did happen to that poor girl in Aruba?

Long ago, when war meant civilian casualties were not off limits to the United States, wars were winnable. The reason Japan is our friend today, as President Bush is so amazed at in every speech, is precisely because a democratic President developed, and his democratic successor used—nuclear weapons. (shhhh, don’t tell the liberals.)

Then we went in and rebuilt Japan in our own image so to speak, and the Japanese have taken their revenge in video games, electronics, and the destruction of our auto industry, simply because they were not allowed to have weapons for quite a while.

Now— you can’t tell me that when Einstein was doing all that genius thinking, he didn’t know that someone could take his discoveries and build a bomb that would change all of mankind. Of course he did. But it didn’t stop him. He wanted the glory, and he figured it would be the other guys fault if they used his knowledge.

He tried to convince the world of his innocence, and the horror about what he had given to mankind…but men cannot help taking the advantage. They just can’t.

Blame it on Darwin and his survival of the fittest.

This same scenario will repeat itself in cloning. The men, who develop it for the benefit of mankind, will watch with sometimes pretended “horror” while designer genes are being patented and sold, altering the human race for all time…and every country that does not have it will want it.

Soon it will be “We can’t let Iran have the cloning patented sequences.”

I always thought it was ironic that Einstein basically gave the world the ability to create a bomb (even though he is cleared from any malevolent intentions), something that pits nation against nation in possible Armageddon for the planet, while Thomas Edison literally lights up the whole world, (not to mention movies, telephone, etc)—and guess who gets on the cover of Time magazine? The poor guy, who invented the internet, Tim Bemers-Lee, and gave it free to the world, will only be remembered in ancient computer instruction books and Ask Jeeves.

Sometimes I think the only reason the liberals like Einstein so much is that he taught at Princeton and Yale.

Now, when America is at war, it dares not kill any civilians in any country, even if our civilians are attacked without provocation. (The World Trade Center) What is O.K. for Islam is not O.K. for the United States.

This brings the advantage to Iran. Every one is so convinced that if Iran attacks Israel we will retaliate, but will we retaliate to win? Or will we retaliate by trying not to kill the innocent civilians, therefore setting ourselves up to lose?

And,what a propitious time it is for these Generals to launch their attack on Rumsfeld. They know that Rumsfeld means to win, because he sees this as a fight for civilization.

But winning doesn’t seem to be the option here—not upsetting Iran is. That’s the message that Clark, (who is still one of Clintons’ men) is telling everyone who will listen.

Once the nuclear bomb was invented, every country in the world wanted it, and thanks to Bill Clinton, they now all have it. President Bush was wise to go and give it to India after the fact. It seems it’s the, “It’s not fair you have one and we don’t.” logic, which when standing alone makes sense, except we all know men don’t always make sense. Some men are just plain loony. All it takes is one.

And in the end, right now, every leader in the world is just digging a hole.

Let’s hope they hit water. Or it’s the Bay of Pigs all over again.

Nobody’s Perfect: Professor Eric Pianka of the University of Texas thinks that 6.5 billion people on the earth is just too much to bear. He decided that 700 million would be perfect, and is hoping that the Ebola virus will mutate and do this necessary culling. For this he was awarded scientist of the year (by idiots), which means he is not the only guy in Texas who isn’t perfect.

Nobody Knows: if Tom Cruise was just kidding when he said he was going to eat his baby’s placenta and cord. I suggest they go on the new reality cooking program and make a contest out of who can actually make a delicious masterpiece out of it. I’m betting on Wolfgang.

Nobody Cares; General Motors spent 17 million for men who suffer E.D. (erectile dysfunction) Now– all retiring CEO’s will get lifetime supplies of Viagra included in their severance packages. With all the money they are now getting on retirement, they will need it.

Nobody’s Opinion; On the May issue of Vanity Fair, we see that Al Gore has finally found an outfit that makes him look masculine. Remember how much trouble he was having picking out his outfits during his run for the Presidency? With him on the cover are George Clooney, Robert Kennedy, and Julia Roberts looking like a fairy out of Midsummer’s Night Dream, or a stalk of broccoli.

Al Gore should hire me for fashion consultant. I would put a picture of him on National Geographic, naked, hugging a tree. After all, there have been a lot of famous woman who posed naked when pregnant: Demi Moore for one. The magazines sold out. A naked Al Gore—couldn’t hurt.

Then I’d take another shot with him standing on the biggest pile of garbage he could find, in sandals and a white Oscar de La Renta Suit. For a third shot, I’d put him in a diving outfit with goggles on in the middle of Wall Street on the cover of Forbes.

Poor Al, he doesn’t get why the average American (note average) does not care if the Hampton’s go underwater; or Washington D.C. or San Francisco, just like he didn’t know who all those statues were at his visit to Monticello.

In the issue there are simulated maps of these cities going under water due to global warming along with many champions who are wearing the green. There is the eerie picture of Martha’s Vineyard under water, and another of Hamptons titled, “Sunken Treasure.” Wow, guess the looters will have to learn how to dive.

This proves that this is an elitist concern. The rich have more to lose, and also so much more to gain by putting huge taxes and emissions fees on all of us poor people so they can feel safe.

Al starts his article called “The Moment of Truth” telling us that the Chinese have two symbols for the environmental issues. (I’ve been telling you the Democrats are in bed with the communists.) They stand he says, for crisis, and danger.

So he gets in a plug for the Chinese and one for the Bible: “Where there is no vision, the people perish.” he quotes.

Yes, you get the feeling from reading this issue that the rich have a vision all right. They are truly scared that all “their” favorite places, will disappear. And their favorite place is not Boise Iowa. Remember, Clinton made sure most average Americans now have to stand in line for up to two years to see Yosemite, and then it will not be from the comfort of your own car.

Because they know the earth is going to end soon, they present a quicker solution than the bird flu. Ludwig Minelli of Zurich Switzerland is very afraid that people will be trying to commit suicide in this upcoming ecological crisis, and heaven forbid—it’s not an easy thing to do. If people mess it up, they will be a burden to society. Medicare could not handle it. Too many amateurs screwing up the attempt will be a nightmare to the government. So Mr. Minelli is planning to set up clinics in every country to teach you how to do it right. One Terri Shavio was enough.

And you will become suicidal, because Al Gore blames President Bush for Katrina, for Iraq, global warming and the earth being destroyed. We are told that the reason China, India, and Brazil will not sign the Kyoto treaty is because President Bush won’t. Poor Queen Elizabeth is worried sick about President Bush destroying the Earth, because England will go first. Who will pay for her castles?

Yes, President Bush, and the rest of us horrible Americans are going to destroy humanity one way or the other. Never mind that we don’t see any actual PROOF, they just keep repeating it over and over. And sadly, that does work.

They have systematically been preaching this mantra for quite some time. All the kids in public schools can crush soda cans and put newspapers in neat piles, they just can’t count them. The kids are told the whole earth will be destroyed by 2050, and they believe every word of it. Soon we will hear that we are addicted to trash. We’ve just GOT to have it.

When I was eighteen, I drove to downtown St. Louis every day to work, and the air was so bad that, on a hot summer’s day, you could hardly breathe. The smell of sour yeast from the Anheiser- Busch brewery was also enough to turn your stomach. Going out to lunch was not an option.

Now, all that is gone, pretty much cleaned up. Yeah, we had a flood here in 93’ but it was not as bad as the one in Mark Twain’s time. We still get tornadoes. They come in the spring, and you get in your basement.

We’re not ready to kill ourselves quit yet.

Of course, everyone admits, the weather has changed, but the sensible are not ready to accept that WE are the cause of the Artic melting.

This nobody has noticed a shift in the earth’s position. What’s my scientific method? Pretty much the same as how the Greeks determined that the world was flat. By a simple common sense deduction.

If you stay in one place all your life, and notice the settings of the sun from year to year, you MAY have noticed the sun does not set in the same place as it did many years ago.

So…there are many reasons for this, and I’m no physicist, but I’m more likely to believe that perhaps a small wobble or turn in the earth (which they know happens) would have a huge effect on all the systems of the planet, not to mention the sun, and the moon and everything else in the universe that we claim to know so much about.

But, that scientific theory does not make money.

And anyway, even if it were the people on the earth causing the problems, fix it. But don’t go backward in time and build windmills and solar energy systems that no one can afford.

Get the best minds to work on it. Built some hills around New York. Circle San Francisco with some of those nifty islands they are building in Dubai. Shape them like eagles, or a giant high heel shoe.

Speaking of big hills, it’s no coincidence that both the National Geographic and Vanity Fair have articles about the Appalachian Mountain mining this year. And didn’t it seem strange that there were all those coal mining incidences in one year?

Also…with the exception of New Orleans, mostly the rich live on the beaches.

But what about Katrina you say? The poor suffered there.

Even Nobodies can surmise that the very rich are very concerned about this problem. The Democratic Mayor of New Orleans, and the Democratic Governor could have been told of the opportunity to ease up on the help…to finally once and for all show the world that global warming is real. What are a few poor citizens when the whole would is in jeopardy? Not to mention the opportunity to make way for more Mexicans, with jobs and rebuilding. Demographic planning is so much fun. Ok…you say, now you’re just being mean. Nobody would do such a thing, and you’re a nut for even thinking it…NO?

Nobody Knows: Not many people are aware that there is technology out there that can affect the weather. Clinton’s Secretary of Defense, William Cohen talked about it in 1997. He talked about using weather as a weapon. Some not so shabby scientists argue that it was possibly that Katina could have been manipulated. Even though it might not be true, remember that companies like BP Petroleum and GE are putting billions of dollars into development of the new global market of environmental solutions.

Nobody’s Perfect; Alan Greenspan regrets “international exuberance” during his reign as money lord of the world. He let out the plans out of the New World Order in the statement, “The world equilibrium is better reached by allowing a number of these countries (basically China, India, and Japan) which are growing at an extraordinary economic growth.” (thanks to U.S. politicians and CEO’s) to continue to outdo us.

It’s called affirmative action for the world, paid for by the U.S. citizens.

Nobody’s Cares: On Tuesday night there will be a movie on Primetime about the Bird flu killing us all. Tonight, getting ready for it, President Bush is working up vaccines. Two million are predicted to die. If you have never seen San Francisco, now is the time, wait…better go see Mt. Rushmore. The taliban like to blow up sides of mountains.

Nobody’s Opinion: It’s hard to write about politics tonight when it’s always the same old, same old. The Democrats always attacking the President…today it was Rumsfield. They’ve already got rid of Delay, who was not even protected by his own party. He was outraged about Dubai, as was any sane person. That did not go over I’m sure with President Bush.

Remember, the President was for the Dubai deal, much to everyone’s shock. He is also supporting giving amnesty to the illegal immigrants, much to everyone’s shock. He called the brave men and women who went to the border, the minutemen…vigilantes, much to everyone’s shock. He closed many of our sacred military bases, leaving the American people feeling very vulnerable, much to everyone’s shock. He says Bill Clinton has become a good friend to him, and a best friend to his dad, much to everyone’s’ shock.

He has scolded the American People for being addicted to oil, as if we were greedy little children, much to everyone’s shock. This is much like telling a wife that is being beaten by her husband that she deserved it. Same logic. It’s our fault we are addicted.

Guess that’s the new strategy. Blame the victim.

He has not vetoed one single pork bill, much to everyone’s shock. He has said nothing about the camera’s going up on every corner, much to everyone’s shock. He has said that immigrants are doing jobs that no one else will do, which is much like calling us a big, lazy, nation. It was the big, lazy people of this nation that came to the rescue of the Katrina victims, which was a shock to no one.

He gave the Medal of Freedom to Muhammad Ali, much to everyone’s shock. He and his father gave the most endearing speeches ever given to a dishonorable man at Bill Clinton’s Library opening much to everyone shock. After he captured Saddam and killed his sons, he seemed to just let the whole war in Iraq take its own course, much to everyone’s shock. He let China buy our ports in the Bahamas, much to everyone’s shock. When he saw how incompetent the Democrats were at helping those poor people in New Orleans after Katrina, he should have jumped in with bravado to save lives…but he didn’t, much to everyone’s shock.

He did nothing while Terry Shaivo starved to death, much to everyone’s shock and total shame.

He said nothing when the Supreme Court took away our constitutional right to eminent domain, which was almost unbelievable.

And the most shocking thing of all is that he has let the Democrats crucify him unmercifully, destroying him, and embarrassing him to the world. Ridiculing him on every turn—calling him a liar, a traitor, a murderer, and yet not a whisper from him. At his press conferences, unlike Clinton, who never took a tough question in his whole career, Bush takes one bashing question after another.

Twice he stuck up for himself…we all went WHAT? Hey! He’s back!

But he was only back for two days, and then he went back into submission.

When he was at Dr. King’s funeral, and one nasty Democrat after another made the most vicious comments degrading the whole event…he said nothing. He should have at least reprimanded the scumbags for doing this at Dr. King’s funeral. It was disrespectful of Dr. King, not just the President. But by now, we weren’t shocked, we were getting used to it.

Obviously, Bush is trying to emulate Jesus. Maybe he thinks it will get him reincarnated. Maybe he thinks if he emulates Jesus, and suffers all the abuse just like Jesus did he will be reincarnated and join the father in heaven. Thereby also getting glory in history.

What he forgets is that by turning the other check all the time he sacrifices us, the American people. Unlike Jesus, he is not saving us, he is hurting us with every silent action. Even Jesus stood up to the money lenders. Yes, we thought we were getting a different man.

One of the reasons I liked President Bush was because he wears his emotions on his sleeves. He actually had big tears in his eyes when he was being sworn in as President. Unlike Clinton, what you see is what you get. It’s obvious he cares deeply about people. He has always been Christ like in his tolerance for the world abuse. He has been extremely kind to people when he can get one on one. Once again, you don’t hear about this because he doesn’t blow his own horn.

Clinton used his dog for a photo-op. Poor Buddy. Bush truly loves his dog, he has trouble putting him down.

He is trying to be all things and tolerate all people.

He can see the evil in Iraq, Iran, and North Korea, but not the evil in his own country.

Obviously the merger with Mexico is not good for this country. He has no intention to stop it. If the reasons are that we need to merge because we need more people for the future war against China, or Iran, or whoever, then tell us.

If we need more people because America needs to compete against the globalizations of the rest of the world, then tell us.

Is Bush sacrificing the downing of American in the short run to save it in the long run?
Then, tell us.

Or do we need this merger simply because our big businesses like the big profits.

Just tell us. Instead of putting out these figures of all is well, go ahead, admit to the truth. It’s doing well for some, but worse for others. Tell us the truth, a service economy will not be able to compete with the rest of the world. Tell us we will no longer be the big dog on the block. Clinton has told us.

You just don’t want to tell us why…is that it?

All in all, we all wish that President Bush would do what God would want him to do. And that is to do the right thing. Fight the evil in this country.

Jesus has his place in the universe. No mortal man can be Jesus.

No, President Bush, instead of trying to emulate Jesus, should emulate George Washington, or Ronald Reagan.

Jesus didn’t expect us to be him, anymore that we can be God.

There must be a good man still in there …it soon will be Easter…can he be resurrected?

Come back to us George, we need a warrior…what good are we fighting overseas if we are being conquered from within?

It’s not too late…Jesus, we are told gave his life for the world.
Soldiers do this everyday. We should expect no less from a President.

Nobody’s Perfect; Hey, I’ll take this one tonight. I bought a whole pack of 98% fat-free devil food cakes, but I didn’t eat just one. There is now only three left out of nine. That’s why no one loses weight on the diet food. You tell yourself you can eat twice as much. The human mind is capable of this kind of great logic. I KNOW you have done this too. Admit it.

Nobody Knows: Who is going to get this nut in Iran first? I suggest we start broadcasting American Idol into the country. That will confuse them. Maybe Barbra Streisand could go over and give him a free concert. She might like it so much, she would stay. She could give her home in California to an illegal immigrant and redeem herself.

Well, have a happy Easter weekend everybody, see you on Monday.

Nobody’s Opinion; “The rich are seldom remarkable for modesty, ingenuity, or humanity. Their wealth has rather a tendency to make them penurious and selfish.”— John Adams

It’s really pathetic. I came THIS close () to winning the Powerball ticket today. The winning 224.2 million was sold at the quick shop that I buy coffee at. I happened to be not buying coffee this week. That’s how a nobody budgets.

But with 224.2 million I could have bought a house like Bill Gates, with over three hundred rooms, that will cater to your personality the moment you walk into them.

I guess Bill makes you fill out your favorite things on a laptop and then he presses the buttons, tags you with a chip, and gives you a map. Then he probably goes back into some secret room and watches you in a leather chair in front of 300 screens. You become Bill Gates’ little mouse in the maze.

If I walked into a room, the Microsoft logo that would be hanging on the wall would turn into some tropical beach, and on the speakers I would hear maybe some old Beatles or Ode to Joy. By now, I’m sure Bill has added smell…the smell of gardenias would come into the room. I would not make it out. Bill would be bored.

Which makes me wonder, what does Bill Gates listen to? Songs from India? “You’re So Vain”? Does he have pictures of Davos, Switzerland, with smells of burnt metal?

But, I slap myself because half of that 224.2 millions would be gone somewhere into the vast government hole. Well, then rightfully I should get 112 millions! I can handle that! No, wait—they actually don’t hand you that, because when you take the money, they tax it again, and now it’s down to 56 million, and I’m sure that doesn’t include state taxes, lawyer fees, accountant fees, needy relative fees, and psychiatrists bills.

The score; government 168 million. Nobody; 26 million.

Oprah makes more than that while jogging.

And it was MY dollar.

The Congress is a great CEO when it comes to making money. They don’t do much to earn it besides going to parties and making absurd comments on TV between vacations. But somehow they keep finding creative ways to get more.

I was thinking of CEOs tonight as I watched Jeffery Immelt, the Chairman and CEO of General Electric being interviewed by Charlie Rose. He just couldn’t wait to get into China and India’s pants. Globalization is the key! All those infrastructures to be built: all those environmental gadgets to be invented, all the jets for the rich Saudi’s—he was beyond himself in his own imagination. He was Buzz Light-year plugged into a wet socket! Get out of his way!

He was through with the America worker, as they all are. Because well…we’re stupid.

India and China have smarter people, not to mention cheaper. He has no hope for our now “service” economy. The soveingty of America makes no difference to this man, because he spends 60% of his time somewhere else.

All the big CEO’s feel the same way. Eric Schmidt of Google, Ivan Siedenburg of Verizon; all big globalists. They deal with the governments of the world now. They are their own countries, and our government does their bidding. The Globalization plan is to spread democracy so that they can go in and build the “infrastructures.”

America has been used up, and sucked out. We are like the leftover oyster shell. Oh sure, we can still buy their stuff. But the real money is in the rest of the world. They know we are not going to have any money to spend soon. Our middle class is disappearing. India has 300 million in its middle class. They think in terms of body counts.

Our politicians, both Democrats and Republicans are now just their brokers.

Meanwhile, down at the nobody ranch, we get to watch pictures like Broke the Back Mountain to keep us occupied, while the game of billion dollar company mergers get pushed off the news with endless stories of maudlin scandals.

We acquiesce to their enthusiasm; we resonate to their shouts of “It’s the free market system, stupid!”

It used to be in the game of capitalism that company mergers were a big no-no, because that of course is not fair to the consumer. Once upon a time, it was watched carefully by our elected officials.

Capitalism works best, like a country, when there are rules. Like a game of baseball, football, or any sport, if the referee only gives the point to one side, that’s not fair. In fact, in World Succor, it can cause vultures to appear.

So, the more mergers, the more the little entrepreneurs get shut out. The companies want your ideas to be theirs. No more Thomas Edison’s. No more Bill Gates.

That’s why the internet is being left alone at the moment. All the little guys are inventing it. It’s a work still in progress. That won’t last long.

Disney just went in and changed the copyright laws when Mickey’s time was up. After all, the market rules, remember?

So…capitalism without fair rules, morphs into socialism, which goes into communism, and then we are just like rats in the maze.

We will have to work hard to find a way out of this house, it’s already starting to smell.

And incredibly, just like Bill Gates house, they are setting up camera’s to watch us.

Nobody Cares; Jane Fonda is going to lead an anti-violence festival in New York. Selma Hayek, Marlo Thomas, and that ageless lady who couldn’t make it as a playboy bunny, Gloria Steinem are going to help out. I’m sure it will be seen on al-Jazeera. Actually, it just might be what is needed to bring bin Laden out of his hole.

Nobody Knows; MTV is going to make a program mocking Jesus, the Pope, and Catholics. Not many people know that China’s Presdent Hu Jintuo now owns MTV. (at least that’s what I read) If any somebody out there can verify that this is true, please tell me. What a creative way to get America ready for the takeover!

Nobody’s Perfect: President Bush today told Senate Democratic Leader Harry Reid that he was “thwarting the will of the American People.” He did not have time to check the Zogby poll which claimed most people oppose it. (amnesty) Maybe the President forgot he was home from Mexico. He does travel an awful lot.

Nobody’s Opinion: How fast we have gone in a few days. From the invasion of millions of toilet bowl cleaners from the South, (if you listen to Hillary) to Iran threatening to nuke the United States and Israel, backed with the blessings of Russia, China, Venezuela, and Cuba. All through this, Newt Gingrich sees the opportunity of a lifetime—so he attacks the President along with the Democrats, because he is going to run for President. And some story about the rape of a stripper is on all channels.

Today is Passover, and we have passed over nothing.

The Catholic Church is practically tripping over their robes to seek redemption for all their past scandals by saving the poor of Mexico. The Democrats are tripping over cameras to claim their conversion to Jesus and the poor, while at the same time doing everything they possibly can to keep all their organizations from the ACLU to the communist party to demonize (one of their favorite words) Christ.

Then a document that’s been in some vault since the 1970’s is now being revealed as the real story of Judas and Jesus. From this vault it made its way to Yale University, and National Geographic who went on to make about 40 TV programs just in time for this upcoming Easter, to teach you to “rethink” your devotion to that fictional man called Jesus.

After all, they rewrite history every day. They are very good at it.

Like the bad news that always goes out on a Friday, they picked just the right time to “release” important new discoveries that have been around for decades. Right.

Only the biggest discovery since spell-check and all reporters on the earth for over thirty-six years decided to let the story wait.

There is more to this text besides Jesus and Judas. There are aliens in the text, but you might hear about that part on FOX.

According to this text, the original sin was when giant aliens came down out of their spaceships and starting having sex with the women on earth. They also liked to eat people, probably with some kind of alien ketchup.

God was not happy with this, so he flooded the earth.

Sometimes in life, what you see may not be real. What you hear may not be real either.

Maybe the politicians we see every day on our TV are really descendents from these aliens. The President is waiting for Jesus to help him. Bill Clinton is waiting for Judas.

I remember at the funeral of the last Pope, Clinton and Bush were having so much fun. You would have thought they were old friends on a golf course.

I was thinking at the time, “What’s wrong with this picture?”

I’m saying it now, “What’s wrong with this picture?”

You can’t believe anything anymore, or believe what’s real or what’s not, because history, facts and fiction are being rewritten daily.

The way things are going, we really might see a spaceship come down, and Clinton will introduce the first alien to visit earth, who will be red with horns and a long tale. After all, Nostradamus was not the only prophet.

This text you will be hearing about all this week on the news, with Jesus and Judas, was part of the Dead Sea Scrolls, which also had some other fun stories.

Like an earth woman giving birth to a child about as tall as a five-story house, who was fathered by one of these “angel” giants, who ate people.

Why they just didn’t play basketball was beyond me.

And with Iran getting all heated up to start WWIII, it might be a good thing if they returned and ate a few Iranians.

Also, the story of the gold from the sacred temple of Jerusalem was also in this cave where the Dead Sea Scrolls wer found…the Scrolls gave directions to it.

So far, no one has claimed they found it yet.

There is one point that you definitely won’t hear…Jesus accordingly said to Judas; “In the last day, they will curse your ascent.”

Hey, I’m cursing now.

Some experts on religious scrolls think this scroll is a decoy.

Some nobody thinks this story is a decoy, because in the real world
It’s the real saints and devils who want you to passover the truth.

Nobody’s Perfect; Seems Brittany Spears, the woman who likes to drive with her baby in her lap, has admitted that her baby got dropped by his nanny. It’s nice to know that Brittany wants to keep her stellar reputation for being a sensible adult up-to-par.

Nobody’s Knows: If the chicken flu is being used as a tool to get rid of all the small chicken farms in the world, in order for the big companies to have a monopoly. I think I’ll buy a few and put them in the back yard.

As a long time reader of The New Criterion, I’ve come across Kenneth Minogue’s name several times. Not only is he the author of excellent essays, unlike the average conservative commentator, he is also a member of the professorate. Currently, he is an Honorary Fellow of the London School of Economics, and began his career at the college in 1954 as an Assistant Lecturer in Political Science. Mr. Minogue was born in New Zealand and primarily attended school in Australia; although, he also took an Economics degree from London University. In 2003, he was awarded the Australian Centenary Medal for services to political science. He is the author of numerous papers, essays, and books such as The Liberal Mind, The Concept of a University, Alien Powers: The Pure Theory of Ideology, and Politics: A Very Short Introduction.

BC: Thanks for taking the time to answer a few questions, Mr. Minogue. Let me begin by asking you that, as someone with an extensive background in the university, indeed as someone who wrote The Concept of the University in 2004, what should be the defining characteristics of such institutions?

KM: The basic point about universities is that they are reflective rather than practical institutions. Nothing in them is ever urgent. The current decadence of most places calling themselves universities is that they are full of unsophisticated people with opinions about how society and its members ought to conduct themselves – along with a passion to entrench those opinions in binding rules. Many professors today are simple moral dogmatists who think that we at last know for certain what is right and wrong. The only thing we may actually be confident about is that, in a generation or two, these opinions will be replaced by others.

BC: Does it make one an incurable romantic to argue that higher education’s purpose is to search for truth? How anathema is such a notion today? How prevalent are those “scholars” whose primary interest is not truth but the practice of indoctrinating their students?

KM: As the classic formulation had it, universities are distinguished by the “disinterested pursuit of truth” – a somewhat risky pursuit at times. Amid the current vulgarity, many students would not even understand the word “disinterested.” Scholarship and reflection can certainly be found patchily all over the place, but all too many professors are merely peddling some form of political salvationism. Universities used to be stocked by the unworldly and the rich. Both sets of people were valuable because they were not trying to “get on” by trying to please future employers. This gave the academic world in earlier times a sense of adventure, of openness.

BC: What do you make of political correctness? There are those who would argue it’s a thing of the past. Frankly, I don’t see how that’s possible. It seems to me that cultural Marxism is more regnant than ever, would you agree?

KM: In my time, a great deal of what used to be intuitive and instinctive (such as good manners) has been replaced by the rule-bound and rationalised. Political correctness is a politicised version of good manners offering power to the kind of meddlesome people who want to tell others how to behave. As to Marxism, it was merely one more illusion that purported to be the key to life. It is significant in that it reveals one of the dominant passions still at work in our civilisation – the passion to create happiness by technology in the hands of a supposedly enlightened elite.

BC: If you were to rewrite The Liberal Mind, what specifically has changed since its original publication? Many of us, in America, insist that conservatives are the real liberals, and refuse to make use of term “liberal” when describing the left. Do you think that it’s misleading, in an age of hate crime legislation and creeping socialism, to pretend that a statist disposition equates with liberal tendencies?

KM: The Liberal Mind was a critical account of precisely what Americans call “liberalism”, which is a sentimental kind of egalitarianism. My targets today would focus even more directly on the fake compassion diffused by politicians trying to sound like men of the people. It is vital never to forget (if I may adapt Scott Fitzgerald) that “the powerful are different from us.” Turning politics into a kind of soggy public benevolence at the expense of taxpayers does no service to anyone.

BC: Forgive my non-detachment, but what a magnificent article you penned this month for The New Criterion. It’s called “Democracy and Political Naiveté” for those who may not have read it. One of your central arguments is that “some classes of people are more dangerously naïve than others.” I had to laugh when I saw it as it would definitely offend every cultural commissar in existence, but could you tell readers why this is the case?

KM: “Democracy and Political Naivete” was concerned with contemporary pieties. Piety is a form of respect for one’s religion, as when the Romans admired “pious Aeneas.” In politics, piety is merely corrupt, largely because it is focused on abstract classes of people such as Gays, Blacks, Women and others who sometimes package themselves as victims. Don’t get me wrong – some of my best friends are Gays, Blacks, Women etc. but I don’t have to genuflect every time they are presented as suffering, and often suffering because of White Male brutes like me. One should always be alert to the targets of ridicule and derision in public life (authority, pharmaceutical companies, corporations, evangelists) on the one hand, and those who automatically evoke pity on the other.

BC: How much has widespread female participation in electoral politics to blame for the triumph of emotion over reason in regards to government’s stance on the big issues of the day?

KM: Yes, the abstract class of “women” has quite a lot to answer for. Plenty of women are of course bright, amusing and hard headed, but there is a lot of wimpish sentimentality being peddled by professional women. Harvard has become a laughing stock because of the Larry Summers affair, with some women going faint at the suggestion that women – as a class – might not be naturally good at maths. The problem results from the Annie Oakley view of women as able to do exactly what men do (which obviously they can’t) and which sells everything valuable about female distinctiveness down the river in exchange for an absurdity. One consequence has been to sentimentalise life and diminish important virtues (by no means exclusively male) such as courage and self-control.

BC: You mention that the male chauvinist position is that men are more creatures of reason than are women, but it seems to me that it is also the feminist position. Is not the truly sexist position one which asserts that Woman, by nature of her genitalia, has something more important to say about politics than Man?

KM: As I said in the piece mentioned above, some women have a distinct and valuable talent for politics. I think the French, for example, lost a trick in going for the Salic Law (excluding female rules) in the Middle Ages. But my guess is that more women than men want to spend taxpayers’ money in supposedly improving the lives of those who cannot do much for themselves.

BC: Is “intellectual” wholly a term of derision nowadays? Is there any merit to the concept of certain individuals maintaining the role of intellectual in society? This question has perplexed me ever since I read Paul Johnson’s work on the subject.

KM: Public intellectuals are journalists, and professors are a lot closer to journalism today than they used to be. Being a journalist used to be a deadly insult in academic terms; no longer. It used to be the case that the French had intellectuals, and the English were merely educated. These days we have intellectuals coming out of our ears. And they are useful, no doubt, in turning public issues into matters of rational debate. Even in answering your questions, I am behaving rather like an intellectual. Few of us today can resist the pleasure of having opinions on subjects we know little about. That is why we need Socratic irony so badly.

BC: What are you working on at the moment?

KM: I am currently working on a book that tries to track the way in which our moral sentiments have evolved in the last century or so. Moral integrity in our dealings with our immediate associates – family, friends, colleagues – has become of less significance than taking up an “ethical” attitude to strangers who are supposedly in need, such as the poor and those living (according to one of those idiotic statistics diffused by charitable lobbies) on “less than a dollar a day.” The dominant strain in morality is philanthropic: it admires devoting one’s life to caring for others. It is “ethical” in a political sense, and no doubt in some ways admirable, but it suits best those who don’t really have a life of their own to lead.

BC: Lastly, and I generally ask this question, do you think that conservatives have a chance to win the culture war? If not, can we at least roll back some of the gains made by the left?

KM: I regard Conservatives as people in touch with reality, and radicals as people aspiring to improve the world. In a sense, I suppose, we need both, though the dominance of improving political radicalism in Western countries these many decades seems to me to have made most things worse. Human beings, as Eliot said, can’t bear much reality, so conservatives had better resign themselves to being a kind of saving remnant. Reality seldom wins votes. So we can’t win, but winning isn’t everything. Integrity is much more important.

BC: Thank you for your time, sir.

Bernard Chapin is a writer living in Chicago whose work addresses cultural and political issues. His book, Escape from Gangsta Island: A School’s Progressive Decline, was recently released while a new book, Slaves to the Feminaria, will appear this summer. You can contact him at veritaseducation@gmail.com.